The overlooked element to success in music lessons
Have you ever wondered why it is that some children seem to succeed with music whilst others quit after a year? They might be learning the same pieces, have the same teacher and opportunities, and yet, one kid will stick to it while the other will lose interest and give up. Why does this happen?
As a teacher with a decade of experience, I’ve often asked myself this question. I have felt guilt when a student decides to quit, like maybe I didn’t give them a good enough experience or I haven’t made music interesting enough for them. On the other hand, I have noticed that the students who end up quitting music lessons are always those that rarely do any practice, i.e. they lack commitment to the craft.
The truth is that parents have a huge role to play when it comes to music lessons. The other part of that truth is that parents often don’t realise their role, leaving it up to their child to manage their learning and practice. But kids - especially young ones - will rarely stick to something for very long, especially when it gets hard and challenging (as music inevitably becomes).
I have seen this pattern over and over again. Parents enrol their kid in music lessons but then don’t realise how important their involvement is in the success of their child’s music. Kids who say they want to learn an instrument may honestly have that desire, but they may also lack the knowledge or awareness that it takes effort, persistence, work and discipline … and more importantly, that music isn’t always fun! But parents will often avoid stepping in with their child’s practice to avoid fights or because they perceive their child has lost interest. The result is that parents will end up withdrawing their child from music lessons.
Instead, if parents were highly involved from the very first lesson with their child’s music lessons, the outcomes would be much greater. Involvement from a parent may include attending every single music lesson, creating a practice schedule (and making sure that schedule is followed), listening to practice and offering feedback, giving rewards for practice, communicating with teachers when a problem arises, checking the music homework and asking questions to their child regarding their instrument and pieces. Basically, parents have to create a home culture where music is valued and where practice is expected.
Piano pedagogue Irina Gorin uses the analogy of a bird to illustrate the importance of parental involvement. One wing of the bird is the teacher. The other wing is the parent. When a bird (student) only has the support of a teacher, it is equivalent to a bird having only one wing. There is only so far, so fast and so high that the bird can travel. When a parent is there, the bird has two wings, and is therefore able to achieve much greater things at a much faster rate.
It is clear that the more invested, interested and committed a parent is, the more likely their child progresses with music. So if you are a parent, never underestimate the influence you have in your child’s music.
